The latest...

Things have been relatively quiet for me the past few days. There has been less stress, less running to and fro, and less angst. Life is beginning to feel more normal and a routine is starting to emerge. All of these changes are wonderful, but now I have time to think, and think, and think. I think I think too much.

When I first arrived in Macau, most of my energy was focused toward, well... survival. You know things like learning how to cross the street and deciding which street to cross. And finding the answer to important questions like, "Can I eat that?" "Can I drink the water here?". Survival. For those of you who are familiar with Maslow's heirarchy of needs, I was definitely operating at the bottom of the triangle. So now that I have found the answers to these burning questions, I can think about other things. I think I may have reached the stage of focusing on "belongingness". Where do I fit in? How do I continue to be me and be part of the team at the same time? How do I let other people know who "me" is?

At this point, I think I should interject and say that none of these questions are meant to reflect anything of the other team members. They are all great, supportive, loving, fun Christian people. They have been so very helpful, and continue to be very helpful, as I am going through this learning period. However, for fear of talking a lot but not saying anything, I think the issue that I am currently dealing with is that, here, no one knows me yet. Sometimes my humor falls short of being humorous, sometimes my thoughts may seem a little too "out there" and sometimes my questions a little to probing. So to sum it up, I miss people who know me well.

Perhaps I am too impatient. Most of the relationships that I am referring to above took a long time, and a few struggles, to cultivate. But there is that certain sense of comfort in being known, and despite this, being loved. So to any of my friends back at home, who think that I am just having a wonderful time and not missing you at all (Pat:), you would be right in one sense. I am having a wondeful time, but miss you none the less.

Now having said all of that, the Lord is good. While I am growing and learning new things about the Lord, the main reason that I am here is so that others might know him as well. The Lord has placed some people in my life that are definitely searching. They ask me many questions about Jesus and how I live my faith. They ask about me my views on sin, happiness and peace. I know that the Holy Spirit is moving in them to give them this curiosity. Please join me in praying that they would come to know Jesus in their hearts, not just their minds. Please pray that I would be filled with the Holy Spirit as I talk to them. That all of my conversations would be "seasoned with salt".

It is such a rewarding and exciting experience to be able to share with Jesus with others. I could describe it in terms of an adrenaline rush. You know that feeling people are seeking when they do crazy things like bungee jump or sky dive, that is the feeling I get after I have opened myself to the leadings of the Spirit. I get that sense of freedom and excitement and peace all rolled into one. What a blessing! What a great God it is we serve. He rewards us so abundantly for doing the very thing we were asked to do.

I think I am starting to notice a theme to my blogging. I begin with the struggles that I am having as I adjust and learn, and then end with how the Lord is blessing me through these struggles. I guess that is ok, I would not want to end on a bad note:)